mmmmmm
Something unspeakable occurred a few days ago. I had to go on a 36 hour fast. No food. No pastries. Just awful. However, around hour 20 of no food and no pastries I devised an incredible plan. I would immediately eat a donut following the 36 hour fast and procedure. Suddenly, there was hope and purpose in my life again.
As I waited for my procedure to begin I thought to myself "when I wake up...there will be a donut" all was right with the world.
As the anesthesia wore off I could barely open my eyes, but I knew that I was allowed to eat. So I called for the nurse. I asked her if she could get my mom. You're thinking, "how sweet, she wants her mom." think again. My mom had the donut. The second my mom came in I stretched out my arm, eyes still closed and said, "donut, please, the donut"
I still hadn't regained all my motor control so holding the donut was an obstacle I hadn't anticipated. I missed my mouth, quite a few times actually. However, my goal was achieved. I ate the donut. It was more magical than I had even imagined. I devoured it in less than a minute.
Then, my mom reached a new stratosphere in the great mom category. She told me she had another donut and asked if I wanted it. Could there be a better mom? The answer I gave....yes. So, I consumed another donut this time while talking with a doctor, still completely out of it. Glaze all over my face. Making comments while chewing with my mouth open.
I felt very happy with myself. And then...............
....I started to feel not so happy with myself. Not happy at all. In fact, I felt nauseous. Very nauseous. And then......I threw up. I threw up again and again and again. And my thoughts during this "why? why? why did I eat the donut! Why did I eat TWO donuts? Why have you forsaken me...donuts?"
Life lesson: A person shouldn't pursue or worship a donut.
Dilemma: Writing this post has made me hungry for...none other than...a donut.
